Video: The Final Chapter - Pinkbike Racing S2E5
Ben Cathro: The Final Chapter
Pinkbike Racing Season 2 Episode 5Pinkbike Racing is synonymous with Ben Cathro. The team seemed like a natural evolution of his Privateer efforts and has managed to encapsulate so many of the good things about World Cup racing - the camaraderie, the dedication, the love for the sport and the willingness to push past comfort and safety in the hope of achieving a lifelong goal. Sometimes we forget that underneath the helmet is a human, with a full complement of emotions. Here Ben takes us through a season that has challenged him in every way possible, and he does so with incredible bravery and candor.
Cathro making it look effortless.
Just because the racing stops doesn't mean the work stops.
The full package, ladies and gentlemen.
Partners
We're incredibly grateful to these sponsors who have embraced this project and the goal of the team. Pinkbike Racing's 2023 partners are:
Continental - Tires
Santa Cruz - Frames
Adidas Five Ten - Shoes
Shimano - Drivetrain & brakes
DHaRCO - Custom kits
iXS - Helmets, protection, & goggles
Deity - Cockpit & saddle
Reserve - Wheels
Manitou - Suspension
Cushcore - Tire inserts
Stan's NoTubes - Sealant
Gtechniq - Bike Care Products
Outside - Support
Santa Cruz - Frames
Adidas Five Ten - Shoes
Shimano - Drivetrain & brakes
DHaRCO - Custom kits
iXS - Helmets, protection, & goggles
Deity - Cockpit & saddle
Reserve - Wheels
Manitou - Suspension
Cushcore - Tire inserts
Stan's NoTubes - Sealant
Gtechniq - Bike Care Products
Outside - Support
Author Info:
Must Read This Week
I’m hoping I come out the other side of my treatment with the ability to plan, organise and commit on my plans to a satisfactory level while putting minimal stress on the lives of everyone around me.
Thank you for supporting me through the past few years and I look forward to making loads more videos here on Pinkbike in the future. 3
Second: ADHD is rough but there is an amazing community out there that can help!
If you haven't listened to this I'd highly recommend it: www.alieward.com/ologies/adhd
It's a podcast called Ologies and this specific one is with one of the leading ADHD docs. It's also really entertaining (and therefore easy to listen to!) It's a great thing to send to friends and family as well if they have questions or need some education.
Can't wait to see what you get up to next!
I've fortunately been diagnosed with uncured adhd this year (38yo), after quite a big head accident I finally surrended to what i feel..
and living with undiagnosed adhd brings a lot of coping mechanisms, some better some worse but usually end up with depression and immense frustration. The diagnosis feel strange because all the 'what if's come to your mind, and you beautifully described it in this episode. We love you, and you're good, I suppose for half of mtb'ers population, biking is a theraphy form, where they can find flow and state of peace
Take your meds, and keep going, at your own pace. You've already achieved man.
That said, if you WANT that, and you've identified things you can do to move in that direction while still feeling happy and motivated with the process, then by all means.
From a fan's perspective, I feel like Ben has brought as much to world cup racing as some of the top podium contenders over the past few years - if not more. That requires a certain kind of talent of its own.
Really looking forward to seeing your next project(s) Ben (and, whatever you do I hope that will involve more World Cup trackside analysis).
Ben Cathro... We salute you.
Now go ride your damm bike!
p.s.... then again... there's also the e-mtb enduro series .... you know... just saying
Love 3
Can't wait for whatever you share with the MTB community next! But, take the time to do you and your family first.
Keep shredding dude!
who wouldn't get a burn out dealing with all he thrown on his shoulders?
To hear he might under go to some drugs for 'treatment' it's scary knowing what this drugs can unbalance your natural chemistry forever... and we do really appreciate this guy right?
Many of the doctors and academical nowadays are just indoctrinated puppets from this evil industry which is looking only for sick ppl/customers not 'healthy never take pills' ones...
Keep up the good work and cheer up. I have ADHD for 50 years and I am fully productive, but annoying adult.
For me is nuts to diagnose as mentally ill and medicate one of proved most outstanding minds in DH content, hope he checks it with more specialists...
There's an old saying I tell myself when I look back at my own life wondering what could have been, which is a poisonous way of looking at life: "The best time to plant a tree is 50 years ago. The second best time is today."
You now know something to help you move forward in life. Don't wear it as an anchor around your neck. I wish you the best in life and in finding happiness. Good luck and make sure you use every resource available to you to improve in ways that are constructive to your life and goals: counseling/therapy, CBT, DBT (this is a good way of dealing with guilt/mourning of what could have been), and be honest with yourself and how you're feeling. And if you choose to use medication make sure you are honest and comprehensive with your doctors to find the right solution for you. Best of luck in your future endeavors!
Cheers Ben
Also, Medication is a personal choice and no one should ever try to convince someone either way (especially a stranger on the internet).
of course I am an stranger arrogant on internet that prefers to be arrogant and un polite with my strong opinions if those can open a chance to reconsider for those who are on taking a medication that can change you and unbalance your natural chemistry forever
I really want to say just stay positive. You’ve given so much more than an average racer does to the MTB community.
Try to focus on all the good things you’ve achieved without knowing about your ADHD - set up your own coaching business, started a WC video series, got picked up by Pinkbike to take that to another level, Pinkbike Racing, cool How To Bike videos.
And then there’s the even better things; getting married, becoming a Dad and learning more about yourself as you’ve grown.
It may not feel like it now but you’ve been living the dream. Just not the one you thought you would.
Give yourself a high five big fella, you’ve earned it.
While I've been lucky enough to lead a happy, fulfilling life since then, my professional aspirations have absolutely been curtailed by my ADHD symptoms, and I'm constantly plagued with a feeling that I've never lived up to my potential.
Watching this has reminded me that there is potential help out there, and I think I'm going to talk to my doctor and see what's available these days. Thanks for being so honest and vulnerable, @ben-cathro, and I'll be cheering hard for you.
54 y/o dad here who started riding a little over a year ago. I can not tell you how much your videos and this series has inspired me.
Prayed for you and your family as I rode my stationary bike watching tonight.
Trying to get better myself and ride more like you!
Kindest regards.
It's what makes your content different, more fun, more analytical and makes you laugh and smile. Embrace it, it's not a disease that can be cured it's just who you are and it's what makes you, you .
Being married to someone on the spectrum (not like I am normal, way worse, but all engineers are) who has ADHD, teaches nursery kids and is a fitness instructor, life is amazing, I wouldn't change 1 thing about her, hyper focused on some things to scatter and disorganised on others, it's what makes her, her and without that she would just be another clone of what we are told is normal. Everyone says she should never change, and she should never change.
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The Ben Cathro of prior to diagnosis is the same Ben Cathro afterwards, maybe they will dose you with caffeine and some legalised speed (if you remember Ally Simpson that raced for the Steve Peat syndicate buy in team, amazing physio and his brain was aligned with both).
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Keep up the good work and being real.
Even dunno if it would be cool, to wish ben to keep up the good work, because even if the results of his efforts are magnificent (what we see), it may be horrible for him to do all the brillant stuff. I wish the best progress to understanding himself and dealing with adhd.
ADHD is shit, yeah. You said "people got bigger problem and get around", that's backlashing and it's never a good idea to compare. Neuroatypical people are just so much more interesting, passionate, geeky, yeah sometimes it's a flaw, but once you understand thanks to psychologists, other neuroatypical person experience, you find your recipe and your way to make things works for you. You'll learn our boundaries. You'll learn so speak up for yourself.
It takes time.
I'm was born deaf, growing up in a hearing environment, I hear with hearing aids and cochlear most recently, I use Cued Speech. I knew from day 1 I was deaf, took me more than 15 years to be assertive, to understand my boundaries, to realize all the shit from valid people. It's a though journey but you'll learn so much.
Big love Ben, you're the hero MTB want. Mad props on these two years of PB racing and showing all the emotions. Not a lot of people do it.
We're all lucky to have you making videos for us. Just be kind and patient with yourself. You've had a herculean task managing a team, making content, racing, recovering, dadding. All a bit much maybe? Go easy and do what you do best, enjoy riding!
Just pick one and ONLY one thing to focus on. Set a goal for that thing. What are the steps you need to take to achieve that goal? Who do you need to enlist help from? Execute.
In the meantime, exercise, ride, and create a daily routine. Follow it, practice it.
Hope this helps!
Aside from all of the coaching/mentoring, thoughtful content, and ripping yourself, this may be your most important work. When you open up, especially as publicly as you have, you never know who you may reach and who may need to hear that. I commend your courage in doing that. Get the help you need, but please don't think that you are somehow a failure for not fitting the mold, and don't let the "help" that you get unintentionally take away from the many gifts and talents that you do have.
On a personal note, while I do not suffer from ADHD, I can say that I am very one sided and am really only good at one or two things. My wife, however very much suffers from ADHD and did not really discover it until she was an adult like yourself. She had a similar reckoning, which involved a lot of "what ifs". I will say that while she cannot focus on one very specific thing at a time as I do, she is able to have twenty metaphorical windows open at the same time (computer windows). She has found many ways to flourish in this way, as she can do so many things well. She has found a way to structure her day to day life in a way that plays to her strengths. She is also much more fun and uplifiting to be around and infinitely more creative and relates to people so much better than I. I definitely wouldn't look at yourself as having a weakness or a deficit. It's just a different hand of cards than some folks have been dealt and you can still succeed with that hand.
I will say this though. It’s one thing to think what could have been, but as someone diagnosed at 39, it’s better late then never. You can’t change it being missed for 35 years, but you can make the next 35 years so much better now.
I probably have a similar thing going on, where it's easy to let things slide through distraction and a vague "perfectionism" (excuse to not do it). And really the phone thing is an addiction: it has similar qualities to people whose goals are derailed by alcohol but won't quit.
There are stories of writers like Douglas Adams, of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy fame, having to be "locked" in a hotel room by his editor to actually get any progress done. Or Roald Dahl would set himself up in a little shed with nothing in there but chair, pencils, and paper. And this is before modern internet/phones.
There's a psychology concept of future reward vs. current desire:
www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-is-a-human/202307/the-conflict-between-current-desires-and-future-rewards
The gym sucks, I can't blame you for not wanting to go there. Maybe there are other approaches but if you're a pro athlete you probably have to do it. You do it for the future reward. And in fact need to go further to plan for the plan -- bringing your phone is like not wearing a helmet. If you need to get stuff done you have to either hire someone else to boss you around or find some other ways to force your future self from getting distracted.
Fin
Hard to try and comprehend how things can make brains work in a different way when you've only ever had your own brain to go on, but that's why reading up can be valuable to understand what it's like for the people that have to deal with it
Like "I should do the dishes or the sink will be full and smelly on saturday *yeah but browsing instagram gets me more dopamine so screw the dishes* " then saturday that person eventually does the dishes, not because he comes to reason but because there's no place nor plate to cook, so it's "full hurry mode" and that's the only way things get done. But the dishes are only the tip of the iceberg. Work, paying taxes, spending frenzy, things with serious consequences.
Then you may also have emotionnal dysregulation, particularly if you have the impulsive ADHD type, and if it goes undiagnosed or in denial that kind of individual can be quite a piece of work for the relatives (my dad probably is).
It can also lead to an inability to link causes with consequences, with as a result someone who hardly if ever takes responsibility for his wrongdoings, which can even look like narcissism (add impulsivity on top of it and it's not fun).
In some cases ADHD may get worse and lead to ODD (opposite defiant disorder) which is real bad.
And many other bad consequences, on top of increasing the probability of wasting one's potential.
ADHDers are fueled by passion, where they can hyperfocus to the point of forgetting to eat, so in the case of Ben he may be really good at biking, but then the peripheral tasks (gym, administrative side of things) may be perceived as super tedious tasks and he may indeed miss his potential as a rider.
These things are real issue, not just some dumb way of describing one's rather normal behaviors. But the constant use of the terms only serves to delegitimize how those with these actual disordered are effected.
Everybody has long-term and short-term goals and desires, everybody regrets some things, and all you can try to do is observe your own abilities and characteristics and make plans. We can look back on how we've behaved and try to make adjustments. In the case of Ben here, whether it's a disorder or not he appears quite capable of functioning in general, he is not completely stuck unable to move.
I'm not saying he shouldn't get medical help but his example included driving to the gym and then using his phone. I can very, very easily see a "normal person" doing that for ordinary "willpower" reasons. It doesn't have to be a contest of who has the most mental illness issues. (Maybe not 2 hours, because who has that kind of time.)